


night people (we get what we need)

by Suicix



Category: GOT7
Genre: Alternate Universe, Ambiguous Relationships, Denial of Feelings, Friends With Benefits, Introspection, Light Angst, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Recreational Drug Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-05
Updated: 2017-02-05
Packaged: 2018-09-22 07:23:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9591635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Suicix/pseuds/Suicix
Summary: What Jaebum tries to tell himself is that if no-one sees them, if no-one knows about this - thisthingthey have, whatever it is, then it isn’t real, isn’t happening anywhere other than in their own heads.





	

The night air is cool and crisp and much needed, and Jaebum and Jackson are alone in the street save for the very occasional car speeding by, too fast to even see them. Now they’re outside, there’s so much _space_ compared with inside at the party, and Jaebum feels loose-limbed, free, _high_. The dealer certainly wasn’t lying when he said it was _good shit_ , even if the pills definitely hit Jackson harder than they did Jaebum. Jackson keeps laughing at seemingly nothing, the sound of it almost a cackle, echoing off into the night. Jaebum can still hear the noise of the party from inside the building, though it’s subdued from out here, nothing like it was when they were in there. It’s like it all happened underwater and now they’ve broken through to the surface, finally reaching fresh air after spending too long in a sweaty sea of people.

Jaebum knew it was time for them to leave when Jackson climbed onto his lap. He’d been edging closer the whole time they were sitting down, half on the seat and half on Jaebum, and it had been fine, at first: Jackson just there on Jaebum’s knee as they spoke to some others, Jaebum’s arms loosely wrapping around Jackson’s waist with ease. When the conversation died down, though, and it was just the two of them and Jackson turned around, actually straddling Jaebum, Jaebum had to get them out of there.

It was a sign of what’s going to happen later, is the thing, whatever shape or form that may take. It could be the two of them on the couch kissing, lips lazy but still wanting it just as much, groaning into each other’s mouths, hands working each other’s dicks. It could be Jackson on his knees for Jaebum the moment they get in the door, mouth slick and eager around his cock. It could be – fuck. Thinking about it has Jaebum wanting more, wanting what he knows he shouldn’t.

He doesn’t know why he let this begin in the first place, can hardly even remember. ( _You can’t remember because you were both high that first time, too,_ he tells himself. He remembers it happening, remembers how Jackson first kissed him, remembers how easily he reciprocated, but he doesn’t remember _why_ , what pushed him to it, what exactly told him _yes, this is fine_. Probably the blood rushing to his dick and Jackson already hard against Jaebum’s thigh.)

That was months ago now. They don’t need to be intoxicated to get off together anymore, though Jaebum tried to pretend that was the only reason why at first. Now, the drugs are just a boost, just them being social. They might have still ended up fucking if they stayed home instead. This way, though, at least there’s an excuse: it’s just the aftermath of the party.

Jaebum’s always looking for excuses, no matter how poor they are. Jackson is his friend and they live together and yeah, sometimes they fuck. More than they should, Jaebum thinks. It was supposed to be a bit of fun, definitely nothing exclusive and somehow even _more_ definitely no feelings, but it’s been a while since Jaebum’s been with anyone else – since he’s even _tried_ to be with somebody else. He’s pretty sure it’s the same for Jackson. Jackson hasn’t been on any dates recently, hasn’t brought anyone home. The last time Jaebum actually went out with someone, he declined the offer of being walked home and went back by himself, returning to Jackson lying on the couch, head in Jaebum’s lap, insisting that Jaebum stroke through his hair. (And Jaebum did. He did until Jackson fell asleep, sprawled across the couch and Jaebum’s body, leaving Jaebum to resign himself to sleep as well. The next morning, he woke up alone in the same spot, feeling disorientated. Jackson had already left to go to the gym: there was a note saying so on the coffee table and a cup of tea beside it, already gone cold. Jaebum scrunched up the piece of paper before throwing it in the bin and poured the cold tea down the sink. He only wished he could do the same with the thoughts in his head.)

What he tries to tell himself is that if no-one sees it, if no-one knows, then it isn’t real, isn’t happening anywhere other than in their own heads. He wonders how often Jackson thinks about it. He wonders what Jackson actually wants from it, if he has the same idea as Jaebum, which is to say, no idea whatsoever. They don’t talk about it. They can talk about so much else, almost anything else, but not that. Jaebum’s never even mentioned it to anyone else. He gets the feeling that Jinyoung can sense something – it’s there in the way he glances across at Jaebum and Jackson sometimes – but luckily he’s never asked. Jaebum often wonders whether Jackson’s ever talked to Mark about it, but he doesn’t think so, probably because he can tell that Jaebum doesn’t want anybody to know, if for no other reason.

So they had to leave the party, because there were people, and even though they only knew a few of them, that was still too much for Jaebum. Now that they’re out here and alone, though, it doesn’t matter. When one of Jackson’s hands reaches for Jaebum’s, Jaebum lets it happen.

Their fingers are laced together, only loosely, and Jaebum wonders how Jackson can’t possibly be cold: his shirt is loose and it doesn’t have sleeves, but the armholes are bigger, showing off some of the sides of his chest. Jaebum wants to run his fingers over the skin and feel Jackson shiver at his touch, wants his mouth on Jackson, wants Jackson begging for it – for more, for _him_.

They only make it about another block or so before Jackson stops, reaching out to grab at Jaebum with his other hand, forcing Jaebum to stop as well. He’s got Jackson’s hand tight around his arm, and the street is empty: Jaebum can’t even hear the party anymore. It feels so far away now, feels like it’s lightyears away from him and Jackson and their clasped hands. It’s so dark out here, but there’s the light of the moon and a dim, half-working street lamp, and Jaebum can see Jackson’s eyes sparkling, can tell that his pupils are probably dilated because of the drugs – because of how much he wants Jaebum. There’s sweat shining on Jackson’s skin, and his tongue darts out to sweep over his lips before he grins, his expression almost manic, and Jaebum wants to _devour_ him.

He’s helpless, really: he lets go of Jackson’s hand and moves his own hand to Jackson’s shoulder, leaning in close to catch Jackson’s mouth in a kiss. Jackson kisses back like he’s starved for it, like it’s been the only thing on his mind all night, the only thing on his mind since the last time they did this. Jaebum’s nails dig into Jackson’s flesh and Jackson moans into it, the sound fucking music to Jaebum’s ears. He gets his other hand around the back of Jackson’s neck, and Jackson clutches at Jaebum’s leather jacket, fists tight on the lapels, pulling him closer. It’s like Jackson wants to be as close to Jaebum as he possibly can, like he thinks he can somehow fuse their bodies together like this, like he wants them to be one entity with one mind and one heartbeat. When Jaebum pulls away to breathe, he lets his forehead rest against Jackson’s. They’re so close that they’re still practically panting into each other’s mouths, Jackson’s breath on Jaebum’s face warm in the cold of the night.

It’s barely a moment before Jackson’s kissing him again, wet and messy, just as hungry as before. Jaebum adds some teeth to the kiss, biting at Jackson’s lips, the hand on Jackson’s neck cradling his head, tight. He feels like he’s higher off Jackson than he is off the pills, even more so when he feels Jackson’s cock up against him, starting to get hard in his jeans. They both are: Jaebum swears his own dick will be straining against the fabric if he goes much longer without it being properly touched.

Upon breaking apart, it’s apparent that Jackson’s noticed that, too.

“Hey.” Jackson cocks his head towards the other side of the street, towards what looks like a passageway no-one would dream of going down at this time of night. “Secluded enough for you, hyung?” For all of his insisting about why he shouldn’t still need to call Jaebum that when they’re only a few months apart, he knows Jaebum likes it, that he likes to feel respected. It’s his way of trying to bait Jaebum into getting off now – that and the way he not so subtly presses his crotch tighter to Jaebum’s and ever so slightly grinds against him, licking his lips as he does.

Jaebum shakes his head. He’s not going to make Jackson get down on his knees at the entrance of some filthy alley, no matter how desperate Jaebum is for it, no matter how willing Jackson is.

“ _Home_ ,” he says instead, trying to be firm, taking hold of Jackson’s hand again and taking the lead as they head further down the sidewalk.

“Can’t believe you’d turn down a blowjob from me,” Jackson says, mock-offended. Jaebum elbows him in the ribs.

“Just not _here_ ,” Jaebum tells him. “At home, I said.”

Jackson sighs, but it’s over exaggerated, and he smirks as Jaebum pulls him along, half a laugh escaping him.

“Right. Fuck me?” he asks, and Jaebum considers. He can do that; he isn’t too fucked up for it. He thinks about it – about working Jackson open and pushing into him and making him scream for it – and feels his cock throb at the thought.

Jaebum’s answer is a nod, his attention on getting them home rather than Jackson for now. Even like this, he has to be the responsible one, he tells himself, but it’s not the only reason why he doesn’t respond with words. _That’s_ because Jaebum can’t let himself give anything away, because he’s scared Jackson will let how _he_ feels spill out of him and then they’ll have to deal with it. Jaebum isn’t blind. He knows the way Jackson looks at him sometimes and what it means. He also knows that he feels something similar, though maybe not quite the same, and thinking about having to come to terms with that is more than a little terrifying. Trying to come to terms with that by himself, without even worrying about Jackson’s feelings, has been bad enough.

He’ll let tonight be what it always is – an artificial high and good sex (and too many words that go unspoken) – and when they eventually reach their apartment and the door locks behind them, he tries not to think about the guilt he’s going to feel in the morning.

**Author's Note:**

> this went in an entirely different direction than i thought it would when i started to write this, wow. come find me on tumblr @ vibetechs !!


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